The Rant Of The Week: Total Desperation

Greetings conversationalists all across the fruited plain, it is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow the one and only Phantom Lord and this is the all mighty Rant Of The Week. As always I am coming to you from my above ground bunker in the rotten apple that is Brooklyn, New York. I must say the heat seems to be getting worse this summer if that is all possible. To make things even more fun, Mother Nature is screwing with the New York City area. There have been many big thunderstorms over the last couple of weeks and 95% of them some how managed to miss the city all together. But I am making the most of what I have to keep cool. I do my part for the city’s way over burdened electrical grid and I keep my AC off during the day.

Now you might be asking yourself what the heck does any of this have to do with what’s going on in the WWE or TNA? Well nothing really. This is my column and I just like to blow off some steam in the opening tirade. Besides with the headache that is TNA it’s best I release my built up anger in small doses rather then go thermonuclear all at once. Though there is a good chance that might happen especially with this “ECW but we can’t call it ECW” invasion they are doing.

But before I get to that there is some other stuff of interest going on in the world of wrestling.

In an interview with the San Diego Union-Tribune, former wrestling champion Bill Goldberg said he wants one final wrestling match because he wants his family to see him wrestle live. "If the money was right, I'd go out there and do it in two seconds," Goldberg said. "I'd have to be totally prepared for it, because I wouldn't want to tarnish my image, but I'd like to be in the ring one more time so that my wife and my son can see me wrestle live." He also discussed his love/hate relationship with the wrestling industry in the interview. "I don't ever want to say that I miss anything about the wrestling business," Goldberg said. "I miss the ability to put a smile on a kid's face, more than one at a time. That was a true charge for me."
Credit to NoDQ for posting this

I have to admit that I did laugh when I read, “I don’t want to tarnish my image”. What image would that exactly be Bill? The one where you were so sloppy in the ring that you destroyed the career of Bret Hart in an instant? Well at least he isn’t bullshitting anyone when he says he’d only do it for the money. To be honest I’d love to see Goldberg come back and spear some people but I doubt it will ever happen. McMahon probably wouldn’t give Goldberg the absurd amount of money he thinks he’s worth. And TNA couldn’t afford what Goldberg thinks he’s worth. Some Japanese promotion probably would shell out a close to seven figure deal for him though so if Goldberg ever wrestled again odds are it would be in Japan before anywhere else in the world.

Maybe Bill should finally try his hand at MMA. Who wouldn’t love to see Goldberg vs. Batista? He could easily get a shit load of money from Strikeforce for that train wreck. It would be way better then the possible Batista/Lashley match in the future if Batista takes the MMA plunge. Though part of me wants to see Goldberg vs. Cena at Wrestlemania. Say it happened next year in Atlanta. The old WCW faithful would boo Cena and his wannabe jarhead act right out of the Georgia Dome if he were facing Goldberg. While a Japanese promotion could easily give Goldberg the money he wants, Goldberg vs. Cena would do an insane buyrate. It would probably be worth the $54.95 to see Goldberg spear the fuck out of Cena and then Jackhammer him. That wouldn’t happen, but it would be fun to see.

Speaking of Cena, there are rumors on the Internet that the WWE might finally be willing to turn him heel. Only instead of him going heel in the way we want him to (i.e. ripping on everyone for turning on him when he went all corporate) it would be him being revealed to be the leader of The Nexus. Now Nexus is doing pretty well for it self right now so I don’t see how Cena being the mastermind behind it all would exactly work.

For Summerslam Cena has put together a team of guys to take on The Nexus. It’s going to be him, Jericho, Edge, Morrison, Truth, Khali, and Bret Hart as the final man on the team. Most people think Ricky Steamboat would have been the final man had he not suffered a burst capillary on his brain (the WWE still refuses to admit it was probably one of the moves he took in the Nexus beating that caused it). I think it’s fairly obvious that they are setting up for a huge swerve in this match where the real Nexus leader will be revealed. Bret Hart makes the most logical sense for him to be the one leading them. Bret held a grudge for all those years. You really didn’t think him beating the piss out of Vince would be the end of it. Of course a lot can happen between now and then. We all know how Vince has his mood swings and what was written in stone ends up getting torn up and they start over from scratch.

Congratulations go out to Bret Hart as he tied the knot for the third time over the weekend as he married a 27-year-old woman by the name of Stephanie Washington of San Francisco. Bret’s had a lot of up’s and down’s over the last decade and he’s come back from every last one of them. So as a life long fan of The Hitman I can only wish the happy couple all the best. What ever happens at Summerslam it should be interesting to see Bret’s involvement in the match since it’s now a 7 on 7 Elimination match. I’m going to guess it will come down to Bret and Cena vs. The Nexus since Cena will no doubt try to over come the odds. I’ll be the happiest person in the world if Bret kicks Cena in the balls and then locks on the Sharpshooter after The Nexus have beaten him silly.

The only other interesting match at the moment that has been announced for Summerslam is Sheamus vs. Randy Orton. Orton has been on FIRE lately as the crowds are going apeshit for him. The RKO was always a cool move, but now it’s really the new Stone Cold Stunner. It can come out of nowhere and when he hits it everyone goes insane. I’m really torn on whom to support in this match because on the one hand Orton is great. But on the other so is Sheamus. I just love it when he calls people FELLA. The X factor in this match is how The Miz will be involved as for the last two weeks he’s been itching to cash in his MITB briefcase only for it to be foiled each time.

If you said a few years ago that The Miz would be a potential WWE Champion I think everyone would have said you are crazy. Now he’s a cashing in moment away from that happening. There was a report that The Miz is in the good graces of those who matter in the WWE because he has been doing everything John Cena did to get where he is now. Basically The Miz makes every corporate appearance he can for the WWE, does a lot of publicity, and kisses the ass of the right people. Hey I’m not going to complain about that because The Miz really is a Goldmine waiting to be tapped so I am glad he is getting this chance to shine. It would be awesome if The Miz cashed at Summerslam but I think it depends on who wins the match. If Sheamus some how beats Orton it’s got to be almost a lock that The Miz will finally cash in and win the title. If he cashes in on Orton he’ll be the first person to lose when cashing in. Either way it should be fun to see what happens.

Over on Smackdown Kane is finally having a long over due run as World Champion. While the whole “who attacked the Undertaker” story is getting a bit silly since it’s obvious Kane is going to say “IT WAS ME” at some point, I’m glad Kane shocked the world and won MITB. Honestly with Kane in that match I figured he would come close but end up losing to Drew McIntyre. It was fun to see him cash in on Rey Mysterio later that night. Kane has been around for so long and he’s always been one of the most reliable guys in the WWE. So to see him finally get a real run as champion is great. Plus Kane is a fighting Libertarian. He was on Freedom Watch with Judge Andrew Napolitano on Fox Business over the weekend. I think it honestly shocks people how intelligent he is. Outside of wrestling, Kane has been blogging under the name of Citizen X for a while. Kane really has come a long way from being that guy with the stupid voice box. I just hope he gets a lengthy title run.

Check out http://www.adventuresofcitizenx.com

Of course Kane’s title run hinges on how long The Undertaker is out of action. When I said the whole who attacked The Undertaker story was silly, I was really referring to the whole “vegetative state” part of it. In the real world the longer one is in a vegetative state the less hope there is for that person to come out of it. It will be amusing if it does come out that Kane did it all along. I’d love to see Matt Striker explain how Kane was the Claus Von Bulow of the WWE. It’s going to be dumb when it happens but it should be at least amusing to watch. Personally I’m holding out hope for The Biker Taker coming back but I doubt he will.

Moving along to TNA, right now they are doing an ECW invasion because apparently the corpse of ECW still had a little bit of blood to be sucked out of it. As a fan watching TNA do an ECW invasion is really maddening to watch. TNA first off is dancing a fine legal line because the WWE owns all the trademarks and copyrights for ECW so TNA can’t even use the name ECW. I’m sure Vince if he wanted he could file a cease and desist the week before the PPV but right now I don’t think they really care enough to do so. TNA really is that person who exists just in the hope they can get the cool persons attention but they never do. So here they are being a full blown nostalgia promotion and don’t get me wrong, I love nostalgia as much as the next person. But like so many classic rock bands who still record great new music I would rather see Tommy Dreamer, Raven, and the others do something new then just take an easy paycheck and rehash something that’s been rehashed all ready.

Apparently Tommy Dreamer is booking this whole thing and I’ll give Tommy some credit. Despite all the bullshit he still cuts some of the best baby face promos. After watching Tommy break down on Impact and do a really good Glenn Beck impersonation, despite all my reservations for why this is such a horrible idea the fan in me was like GO GET EM TOMMY. I can’t explain it but for probably many others and me Tommy has this ability to connect on a personal level with the fans. If you are a fan of his you want to see him overcome the odds. Tommy can take a beating better then anyone else and he can just draw you into the match as you root for him. That’s what wrestling needs. It needs people you can get behind to root for. But this whole ECW thing is just such a bad sign of desperation on TNA’s part. I hope it’s somewhat of a success for TNA because if it is then maybe Tommy can do some more booking on the show. Some people shit on Tommy’s booking abilities based on his stint in OVW. I never saw that stuff but you know what…what TNA is doing now is not working. It hasn’t been working for a long time now. A desperate change is needed and I’d rather see Tommy get a shot then them just stay with what they are doing now.

I know it will never happen and Dixie is as stubborn as Vince McMahon. But one can hope and dream. TNA landing Paul Heyman will probably not happen because Dixie refuses to give Heyman the power to fire people from the last reports on the situation. Now maybe something has changed between then and now, but at the moment it looks like the messiah of extreme won’t be crossing the line.

Hey that was a nice one liner. I do surprise myself sometimes.

Heyman was right in his criticism of TNA in that their biggest problem is not creative but the fact no one knows whom the hell they are. Look at TNA’s buyrates. Allegedly the last few ppv’s have been doing UNDER 10,000 buys. Apparently things are so bad that there isn’t even that many people bothering to stream them for free. I think that should be huge alarm bells that if people can’t even be bothered to basically steal the broadcast that it tells you what the interest level in the product really is.

TNA’s Nielsen ratings are usually between 0.9 and 1.15 give or take. About one and a half million people watch Impact every week. For a network like Spike that’s actually a pretty respectable number. But the problem is TNA gives people no reason what so ever to want to fork over $34.95 for a PPV. They give everything away for free on television and when they do that they don’t even bother hyping it. If the numbers are correct then this means less the 1% of the TNA viewing audience bothers to order a TNA PPV.

Dixie and company must be certifiably insane or perhaps on drugs or both if they think their current business model is a good one. It really is like a broken record because a lot of us on the net have been saying this stuff over and over and over and over and over and BAH GAWD OVER. But the people in charge of TNA are content in continuing to drive the company right into the ground. Sure they do something’s right, but most of it is just so idiotic.

Take for example this “PPV Quality TV Special” planned for the Impact after the Hardcore Justice PPV on August 8th.

According to prowrestling.net, there are plans to tape a special edition of TNA Impact the night after the Hardcore Justice PPV. Essentially, the idea is that it will be a "free PPV" event. The working title is "The Whole Fn' Show" and all the matches will be PPV-quality with no storylines/skits.

You really can’t make this sort of stuff up when it comes to TNA.

WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF DOING A PPV IF YOU ARE GOING TO ESSENTIALLY DO ONE FOR FREE A COUPLE OF NIGHTS LATER???

The best part about this mess is this show will be headlined by RVD vs. Abyss in a “Stairway To Janet” match. In case you’ve missed it, over the last month or so Abyss has been carrying around a 2x4 covered in nails that he calls Janet. So far Janet has lost to the ring canvas, the turnbuckles, and a side of beef. It’s basically the old Stairway to Hell match from ECW. I really hate Abyss right now. There was a time when it could be argued he was actually one of the best big men in wrestling. Now he’s a fucking parody of a joke. I really hope Abyss loses this match so he can just go far far FAR away. Abyss being this gigantic psycho retard is just horrible and the whole Janice think makes him look even more stupid if that is even possible.

I just still can’t believe they are doing this show a couple of days after the PPV. Granted it could be a test run for possible Clash Of The Champions shows in the future but like they say, timing is everything and this timing just sucks. The one thing that annoys me about this TNA ECW thing is it is doing NOTHING to build up people in TNA. The good thing about ECW was you would always get a couple of show case matches on the card. Where the hell is that for this show? Why isn’t Samoa Joe who is clearly the new Taz on this show? Why isn’t Homicide who clearly would be the new New Jack on it? If Sabu were on the show I’d love to see him take on Jeff Hardy. I’m glad some of the old ECW guys are getting a much-needed paycheck but Jesus you could easily do some ECW/TNA matches here.

See it’s stuff like this I’m sure they didn’t even think about. Well I’m sure they thought about it but someone probably said it wouldn’t work so they said the hell with it.

Dixie seriously. What ever Paul Heyman wants I can do it for half the price and I can do it a hell of a lot quicker. TNA has my contact information buried somewhere so I’m just putting it out there in case this doesn’t work.

There is a lot of stuff I am not covering simply because it hasn’t aired yet. I really wish TNA would move to doing shows live on Thursday nights. I know a lot of people probably base their decision to watch TNA solely on how the spoilers look.

Well the wrestling fan part of my brain is willing to give all of this a chance. But the cynical jilted part of it is realistic and odds are this might be a disaster. The only match announced at the moment for the PPV is RVD vs. Jerry Lynn in a non-title bout. That should at least be a good match because Jerry can still go and RVD always had some of his best matches against him. Apparently TNA will be announcing on the website after Impact some of the names that will be on the show. It’s not like that should be on television or anything.

I mean seriously could you imagine the WWE even for a weak PPV telling people “oh by the way go to WWE.com to find out who’s going to be on this thing…”. It would NEVER happen. The Internet is a good marketing tool but it’s nothing compared to the power of television. And they wonder why no one bothers to order the PPV’s. Paul if you do get an offer you cannot refuse you really have your work cut out for you to clean up this mess.

On that note I think I am done for this week. I’m a depressed enough person as it is and thinking about TNA honestly depresses me even more.

Before I go I want to share a link with you my loyal readers. My friend Trin has a page on the art site RedBubble. http://www.redbubble.com/people/rushingtide

She is an amazing writer and artist with photography and photo manipulation. She has some amazing art pieces for sale on this site, so maybe if you see something you think is really cool then place an order. I personally bought a copy of her piece called “Bleeding Me”. Metallica song titles are a recurring theme in her art pieces. You can’t go wrong with that.

So until next time remember someone has to give you this information and it DAMN well has got to be

You can click here to send me any and all feedback at phantomlordnyc@yahoo.com or leave me some feedback on my Facebook page under my given name http://www.facebook.com/josephrd

The Rant Of The Week: Paul Heyman's Midas Touch

Greetings conversationalists all across the fruited plain, it is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow the one and only Phantom Lord and this is The Rant Of The Week. There’s a lot of stuff going on in the world of wrestling so you can imagine I will have plenty to say. First summer is officially here and the Big Apple is the Baked Apple right now. Summer is here and good lord is it hot.

First off congratulations are in order to Brock Lesnar as he defeated Shane Carwin by submission (yes you read that right) to become the UNDISPUTED UFC Heavyweight Champion of the world. It was a hell of a fight as Carwin beat the living shit out of Brock in the first round, but since Shane hasn’t gone past the first round in any fight Brock may have gambled with the biggest game of rope a dope ever. Shane was clearly gassed and Brock got a take down and eventually he locked in an arm choke. Shane Carwin tapped just as his head started going from red to purple.

For a minute, Dana White probably was biting his nails as Brock was getting the bejesus beaten out of him. Brock is the UFC’s golden boy and for a couple of minutes in round one it looked like karma was coming back to Dana for mocking Strikeforce after Fedor’s loss last week. But all is well in the UFC as Brock is back. He recovered from an illness that almost killed him and he reclaimed his throne. See now that is what we call compelling television. I guarantee Vince McMahon was probably watching the PPV or has by this point because he knows even though he claims there is no competition (ITS TWO DIFFERENT THINGS DAMN IT), UFC is the reason all the adult male fans are leaving wrestling in droves. Well that and booking things for kids and watering everything down to the point where even the most die hard of fans says this is stupid.

But Vince will never buy that. The people that kiss his ass under him will continue to say “Oh well its two different audiences…no need to worry about those 1 Million buys boss”. It’s amazing how even a bad throw away UFC PPV out does most WWE PPV’s by a wide margin. The WWE’s solution to everything being bland is MORE GIMMICKS. Another cookie cutter PPV is coming up this time in the form of Money In The Bank. I guess the train wreck spot at Wrestlemania is now gone for the guys who would otherwise never get on the PPV because the WWE has decided to do a PPV with not one but TWO in the same night.

Does the word burnout not even mean anything to these people? A match that was actually interesting and worth the wait till Wrestlemania now will happen twice in one night. It’s no wonder no one actually orders PPV’s anymore. They keep jacking up the price but not the effort in making one want to actually pay to see it.

Paul Heyman gave a pretty good interview to Fight Magazine after the Lesnar/Carwin fight where he noted that Pro Wrestling fans are now UFC fans.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDOcy7GlhYQ

UFC is the WWE and Strikeforce is TNA. UFC is the multi million-dollar giant and Strikeforce is the well-funded yet seemingly inept competition. UFC has the dominant place in the market and Strikeforce is doing everything they can to get a foot in the door. He said in another interview with www.mmafighting.com that UFC did more PPV buys domestically then all of Professional Wrestling did world wide. It’s not hard to understand why. But I am sure there are people all over the wrestling industry who still don’t get it and it’s only a passing fad. I know Ric Flair said as much in an interview from a couple of weeks ago. Then again Flair probably only said that because some guys in the UFC make a fight what he used to in a year. With three divorces and alimony’s to pay, he is a tad bitter.

Speaking of Paul Heyman, right now TNA is betting everything on an ECW invasion angle in the hopes that Paul Heyman will come to TNA and save them from the fate of WCW before them.


TNA officials have gotten more aggressive over the past week or two when it comes to signing Paul Heyman. As noted before, Heyman has been offered the head of TNA creative job but Heyman wants a role where he’s the guy running everything, something similar to Dana White in UFC. It was also noted that he sees the creative side of things as a problem but not the biggest problem.
Credit: F4WOnline.com

If Paul wants the keys to the TNA kingdom then HAND THEM TO HIM. Paul should make it Iron Clad where no one can under cut you or sabotage his work. But as bad as TNA’s creative team is, it’s not the biggest problem there is. The biggest problem TNA has is no one knows whom the fuck they are. TNA has some of the worst promotion, which is amazing considering they have a great TV Pitchman in Don West on the payroll. How many people bought Mark McGwire rookie cards because of him? Are you telling me he can’t be on television at least shilling matches and up coming events?

TNA relies heavily on the Internet, which is nice, but the Internet only goes so far and I’m pretty sure this is what is meant by “not the biggest problem” or at least one of them. TNA does these great Before The Bell specials sort of like UFC’s Countdown To shows but unlike the UFC ones, Before The Bell ends up on Youtube and not on Spike where it should be.

Before a PPV why isn’t there at least a special on Spike to entice people to order the show? Well I know one reason why. It’s because TNA thinks TV Ratings are more important then PPV buys. See it’s that kind of thinking that if Paul Heyman does sign with TNA needs to be the first thing to go.

I could list a whole bunch of things wrong with TNA just from a production standpoint. I am sure Paul has these very things down on a list and if he does sign they will be first things addressed. Anyway you look at it, Paul knows rebuilding TNA from the inside out won’t be an overnight thing. If he were to take on such a thing, he has made it clear it has to be worth the sacrifice to his family. It could possibly be a five-year project to turn TNA in a company that is worth a damn…much less one that is making money and lots of it.

On Friday night TNA held a show here in Brooklyn at MCU Park where the Brooklyn Cyclones play and they drew their biggest North American paid attendance with between 5,500 and 6,000 fans. I was in attendance and I have to say the difference between the television shows and these house shows is astounding.

I have said a lot of horrible things about Jeff Jarrett over the years and I think I would like to take some of them back right now. Jarrett books the house shows and from top to bottom it was pretty damn good. No bullshit angles, no nonsense, and no nothing usually associated with TNA. It was a good old fashion professional wrestling card top to bottom. It’s such a novel concept to do pro wrestling that it could just work for them if they tried it.

Despite what you might think given my generally negative attitude towards TNA, I want to see them succeed. Obviously there are 6,000 other people here in the New York City area that wants to see them succeed as well.









Just a sample of the pics from the show that I personally took with my vastly outdated Nikon Coolpix 885. I pushed the limits of the ZOOM to its breaking point. If you are inclined to, on Facebook I have more photos from the show.

But look at that crowd. There is a fan base and it is willing to continue to support TNA. Now I don’t know if Paul Heyman will be the Messiah some make him out to be. Does he have the Midas touch to turn everything into Gold? I don’t know. But one thing is for sure here. What TNA is doing right now is not working. What TNA has been doing for the last eight damn years has not worked and it will continue not to work. TNA has the wrestlers with the talent to pull things off. TNA is like a gigantic ship that is loaded to the gills right now. But it has no one at the wheel and its just going in circles over and over and over. People in TNA who probably read this column know that is a fact.

Ah well we shall see what happens. There is a rumor floating around that Hulk Hogan is pushing for Abyss to win the TNA title at Victory Road so he can face him for it at Bound For Glory.

I don’t want to get all conspiratorial here; but the show was rumored to be in Charlotte and built around Flair suddenly gets moved to Tampa and Hogan is pushing for a title shot.

Well I’d probably order the PPV just to see it. There would be a lot of betting pools on how many bumps Hogan takes before his back finally breaks into a million pieces. Hogan doing a thumbtack bump is an amusing thought. Who would have ever guessed when Hogan was bullshitting about being up for the role of Randy The Ram that it would actually come true? Hogan’s back is seriously messed up and he has to be INSANE to think this would possibly work. Well we know he’s all ready insane, but there’s different levels of insanity and he’s going off the deep end if he thinks this is a good idea assuming the rumor is true.

But then again it wouldn’t surprise me if it were. I mean you really didn’t think Hogan was putting over Abyss with out thinking of himself in the long run did you? Hulk Hogan only puts someone over so long as it makes him look better in the long run. We shall see what happens. I really hope TNA doesn’t do something that stupid but knowing them will.

That would be a fun question to ask Paul Heyman. Say he does get an offer he cant refuse from TNA and he comes in just as Hogan is crowned champion. How in the hell does he fix that kind of mess?

In case you haven’t noticed, TNA has been using the likes of Tommy Dreamer, Raven, and Stevie Richards as part of some sort of angle where they just show up in the crowd and watch a match and then disappear. Apparently a few months ago TNA had some sort of focus group do market research and the one thing that came back in unison was people liked ECW.

Well no shit. Everyone loved ECW. But its 2010 and while we still love Tommy Dreamer, Raven, Stevie, and the others…I don’t want to see a rehash of a rehash of a rehashed angle.

See what people liked was the ECW show it self. Lots of wrestling and minimal bullshit. Anything that happened of importance happened inside the ring and not in some pre-taped sketch in the back. Hell I would take Mid 80’s Memphis Wrestling over ECW. It’s not that hard to figure out what works and what does not. It’s all about the build to the big match. You have to get us emotionally invested into wanting to see say Jay Lethal overcome weeks and weeks of punishment to get the big win and revenge over Fortune.

TNA would end up doing something that could last weeks in one or two shows and that is the problem.

ECW was old school in the sense it was all about the build to the big ECW Arena show. Sure there was more violence but there was plenty of old school stuff to tug on the old heartstrings. That is what TNA needs to do in a nutshell.

Abyss keeps referring to “THEY”. Well I hope “they” turn out to be the ECW guys and “they” end up beating the crap out of him. Abyss would have never been worth a damn in the real ECW. What he needs to do is just go to Japan or CZW all ready and win some deathmatch stuff. I’d rather see a Youtube clip of Abyss taking a swan dive into a pile of light tubes in some parking lot then it happening on Impact.

Moving along to the more ridiculous stuff in the news, this one really made me laugh when I read it. Read it yourselves and I’m sure you’ll have the same reaction.

The Wrestling Observer is reporting that Vince McMahon has banned the "knife edge" chop from use in WWE matches. The chop, which was made famous by Ric Flair, generally gets a "woo" reaction from the crowd after it's used by a wrestler, and Vince does not want the crowd woo'ing as it of course reminds them of Flair, who works for TNA right now. It should be noted that straight down chops like the ones used by The Great Khali and Big Show are still being allowed as they don't draw a "woo" reaction from the fans.

Vince McMahon might be the best promoter in all of wrestling, but he really is a schmuck sometimes and this is one of those times. What is next? Do you ban punches because it might remind someone of Hogan or someone else who’s on the McMahon shitlist? Though apparently this rule has been in place for a while now but only Flair and Shawn Michaels were allowed to do them.

There is a solution though for this. I suggest everyone who is reading this column who is going to some sort of WWE event in the future, anytime Show or anyone else does an open hand slap you have to do a WOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Hell you should just do it at random times to really drive them nuts. It’s always fun to screw with the audio and make them dump out entire sections of the crowd if they aren’t reacting the way they want to.

The Nexus Angle continues to be the best thing the WWE has going right now even though it almost got cut off at the knees last week when Wade Barrett had a visa issue to be worked out. The Nexus rookies ended up beating up Arn Anderson, Dean Malenko, Jerry Lawler, Michael Hayes, Mike Rotunda, and Ricky Steamboat in an awesome angle. Steamboat is in the hospital for real due to a broken blood vessel in his brain (not an aneurism as initially feared).

Right now they are playing it as the heels of RAW are ganging up on the good guys who are trying to take out the Nexus. Arn Anderson did a rambling but still damn good promo on RAW last night where he told Sheamus that he’s basically gonna get his ass kicked by them in the end. I know people complain about old guys who hang around way past their prime (cough Hogan cough) but you know what, I wanted to see The Nexus take on some of the Legends in a street fight. During RAW last week when all the legends formed a circle and rolled up their sleeves you knew that it was going down. Who wouldn’t love to see Arn get some revenge with a tire iron along with Barry, Mike, Sgt Slaughter, and other old timers? Dust off Tony Garera and whatever corner he’s been hiding in and have him be part of it. A good old fashion eight-man tag would be awesome.

See now I would want to see the legends come out of retirement for a shot at revenge at the young punks. Nexus in a no holds barred fight against the legends would do way more for the angle then lame talking segments.

The WWE got lucky at the end of RAW when John Cena beat the living shit out of Black Cena Darren Young. That was the first time in years that John Cena didn’t look lame to all the men in the crowd. Usually I laugh at Cena when he’s doing his “I’m quiet so it means I’m serious” then “GRRRRR I’M ANGRY” schitck, but last night it worked big time. I am looking forward to see what happened next as Cena will be in a Overcoming The Odds 7 (well I guess 6 now) on 1 match next week. There really is so much that still can be done with this but I fear they are barely scratching the surface on purpose. I say go all out and bring back the unpredictability factor to RAW. That was the one good thing about the Attitude era. You didn’t know what would happen next. At any given moment all hell could break loose. The Nexus angle is bringing that back. Someone being left in a pool of blood couldn’t hurt either.

There is just one small thing that I don’t like about The Nexus. Can we please have them wear some clothes? They aren’t wrestling so why are they in their full gear? Have them all dress up in matches black jeans and shirts with giant N’s on them. It just looks weird when these guys who up all dressed to wrestle even though we know they aren’t going to. Just put some damn pants on them…please.

Other then that the only thing of interest over the last few days was last week The Undertaker made it official with his Old Lady Michelle McCool. She officially became the new Mrs. Undertaker and we can all expect her to run the WWE Women’s division with an iron fist as long as she is. We used to joke that Triple H and Stephanie’s daughter Aurora would someday break Moolah’s record as longest reigning Women’s Champion. Well it looks like she has some competition now. Though with RAW having a Divas title and Smackdown having a Women’s championship in theory both of them could have record breaking runs.

I can’t hate on McCool though. Right now the FLAWLESS LayCool team is tremendous on Smackdown. People hate Layla but she really has improved so much since just being a diva search winner. I look forward to the day when they break up because McCool wants her belt back. That will be a fun feud even though we know who will win in the end.

On that note I am done for this week. It’s way too hot here to continue. I mean I could, but right now I think I’ve covered all the bases for this week. It will be interesting to see how many buys Lesnar’s fight did and how many combined WWE PPV numbers it equals.

Well until next time keep cool and remember someone has to give you this information and it DAMN well has got to be me.

You can click here to send me any and all feedback at phantomlordnyc@yahoo.com or leave me some feedback on my Facebook page under my given name http://www.facebook.com/josephrd

The Rant Of The Week: Who's The Narc?

Greetings conversationalists all across the fruited plain, it is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow the one and only Phantom Lord and this is the Rant of The Week. As always I am coming to you from the rotten apple that is Brooklyn, New York and summer is almost upon us. Well for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere. To all my readers in all parts south, I hope you have an enjoyable winter. But yes it is approaching summer and things are heating up in the world of wrestling. For years the WWE has been phoning it in and finally out of the blue when no one is really paying attention they do something that still has people saying, “Damn did you see what happened on RAW” almost five days later.

Do you have any idea how long it’s been since they’ve done something like that? It’s been a REALLY long time. It’s been so long that I almost forgot what it was like for something this amazing to happen.

But alas things might be off the track all ready as we have some breaking news.

FIRE UP THE DRUDGE SIREN!!!



WWE has come to terms on the release of NXT first season rookie Daniel Bryan (Bryan Danielson) as of today June 11, 2010. We wish Daniel Bryan the best in all future endeavors.
Credit to WWE.com



What? WHAT??? Oh it gets better folks because you know there’s something that will just make you want to punch a wall with this one.

Around the time that WWE announced it on their website last night, Danielson changed his Twitter username, dropped the WWE references on his page and wrote the following:

"Just changed my twitter name to Bryan Danielson. The winds of change are stirring."

So there was some hope this was all part of the nXt angle. I mean it would make sense for the WWE to fire on of the upstart rookies as punishment for beating the piss out of their biggest cash cow. But oh no…it’s never that simple with the WWE. Everything is done for a reason and if you heard in the middle of the night that is the sound of ultimate suffering. My heart made that sound when the six-fingered man killed my father. The entire Internet wrestling fan base makes it now.

Okay I had to throw in some Princess Bride there for the overdramatic but the point remains. Even in the middle of the night there were plenty of people collectively saying WHAT THE FUCK. Then we find out the what part and well if you are eating or drinking then I suggest you finish up and take a deep breath.

As noted before, the reason being told for Daniel Bryan's release is because of him choking Justin Roberts with his own tie during the NXT invasion angle on RAW.

Word is that someone very important complained to WWE officials about the angle with the idea that kids who were watching may think it's fun to choke people with their ties. It's unknown who actually complained but it had to be someone with a lot of power.

Bryan is being described as a scapegoat. WWE does want to bring him back to the roster once the whole thing blows over.
Credit to www.f4wonline.com

Excuse me for just a moment…



Okay who’s the narc? I mean seriously who ever complained about this should be smacked. There’s no easy way to put it here. Kids might think it’s fun to choke someone with a tie??? Are you fucking kidding me? Kids do a lot of stupid stuff on their own and find numerous ways to hurt themselves and others. I’m pretty sure there have been cases of kids choking other kids before this and it’s safe bet there will be after this and Danielson choking Justin Roberts will have no baring on that what so ever.

Where was the outrage when Batista tried to run over John Cena with a car on PPV a month or so ago? Where was the outrage when a couple minutes later Cena threw Batista off the car and through the stage? This is the same company that has no problem with Triple H bashing people in the head with a sledgehammer and yet a fucking tie is cause for concern? Sheamus goes around bashing people with a pipe for God’s sake. Maybe the WWE is screwing with the Internet here. I hope that’s the case but either way I can feel my blood pressure rising and it’s a been a really long time since anything the WWE has done has gotten me fired up. Nah they’re not screwing with us here. If they were screwing with us then axed the whole first season cast of nXt. What happened here is some corporate pussy just potentially ruined the greatest angle of the last decade.

Oh you might think I am jumping the gun here and pushing the panic button a little to early here? This is the WWE after all. Do we remember what happened with Muhammad Hassan because of the unfortunate timing of the attack on The Undertaker? UPN panicked and refused to air anything with him on Smackdown and because of that the WWE in turn panicked and they “killed” off Hassan a couple weeks later at The Great American Bash.

WWE's creative team has been re-writing the RAW script this weekend. Not only have they been re-doing the NXT angle but other things are being changed as well for this week's show.
Credit to www.f4wonline.com

That right there is your reason for panic. Anytime the WWE re-writes anything on short notice it is never good. The fact they are changing the nXt angle is enough for me to be concerned. I am willing to see how this goes because Wade Barrett is so awesome so I think what ever change happens he can make it work (at least until SuperCena destroys them all). But I have no faith in the WWE when they are in panic mode. RAW tonight shall be interesting to see what happens. They all ready had the season 2 pro’s beat up all the rookies so they don’t get any ideas on nXt.

Well they had a big old brawl on RAW and Sheamus ended up getting involved with his little steel pipe. Later in the show the nXt rookies grabbed Bret Hart and roughed him up and threw him in the back of a limo and it pinballed around the parking lot crashing into cars.

Okay so we are clear here. Vehicular assault/hit and run’s are fine. Sheamus hitting people with a little pipe is fine. But Danielson making the mistake of choking someone with a tie isn’t.

My God you people have some messed up priorities at Titan Tower.

The angle continues on Sunday as Bret Hart fired Wade Barrett so all the nXt rookies want contracts and if they don’t get them then there will be more trouble.

I really hope they come up with something that doesn’t look like a joke this Sunday.

Moving on to season 2 of NXT, aside from Joe Henning having the worst name ever and Husky Harris (Windham Rotunda) being my new favorite drunken redneck after Trevor Murdoch, it’s going to be an interesting one. So far a personal favorite of mine is Percy Watson. You just can’t hate him no matter how hard you try. He is the ying to Black Cena’s yang as they are supposed to be a party boy tag team. Now Percy I can buy as a party boy (in the Steve Urkel sense). Darren Young not so much. But man if they play their cards right he is going to be the biggest star of the new decade. If you are going to cater to children then fine. Here you have a guy that kids would love to get behind. If you think the beating Cena got was bad with kids crying, it would be nothing compared to the reaction kids will have when Percy gets beat down.

Now maybe I am getting my hopes up, but I like Percy all ready. How can you hate a guy who wrestles with Urkel glasses? I know I can’t and I’m pretty sure there are many of you who can’t either.

After watching nXt last night it’s pretty clear the WWE still has no direction for the show. They want it to be “reality based” but Striker keeps everyone on a short leash when everyone is jawboning at each other. There is some hope with Kaval a.k.a. Low Ki on the roster for this season. The paring of him and Laycool is a very amusing one as Layla and Old Lady McCool treat Kaval as a lil puppy who is oh so cute. A lot of people were angry that the WWE would do such a thing, but you have to remember people with a juvenile sense of humor run the WWE. Personally I hope there is at least one video of Laycool shopping and Kaval having to carry all the bags. It’s all about paying your dues in the WWE…lol.

Speaking of Laycool, as much as I can’t stand The Undertaker’s Old Lady and how she runs the women’s division on Smackdown…even I can’t deny how great she and Layla are together. It was fairly obvious they paired them up to be the WWE’s version of The Beautiful People and it’s worked to perfection.

The Wrestling Observer is reporting that WWE creative is very happy with team "Lay-Cool" which consists of Layla El and Michelle McCool. It's being said that a few people within WWE were upset at the fact that TNA was able to create The Beautiful People and make WWE's women's division look weak in comparison. However, that attitude has apparently changed as the feeling now is the creation of Lay-Cool is now better and more popular than The Beautiful People are in TNA.
Credit to www.f4wonline.com

Well the WWE must feel vindicated now considering how TNA treats the Knockouts absolutely horrible. The WWE has never been serious about pushing the women since they know at best the Diva’s are a piss break/beer run at most shows. But TNA knows damn well that the Knockouts are the only proven draws they have and they do everything to short change them and screw them over at every turn. Wrestling is a man’s sport and profession. So obviously if some women are on a show and they out work and out draw the men…well odds are you’ll have some people in power not to happy about that. It’s amazing to think how much money TNA has blown over the years on “big name” stars yet when it comes to the stars they all ready have they are as cheap as it gets.

Several of the TNA Knockouts are currently angry over the money they are being paid to work. Most of them earn indy level salaries and are working for a national promotion on TV. Some of them are having to hold down day jobs in order to make ends meat. A number of them spoke up at the last set of tapings about this but there is no word yet on how it all came out. Christy Hemme who no longer wrestles and only does backstages interviews recently re-signed for around $150 K for five years. No other female in the company is making anything close to this and they are working matches on TV and house shows. Gail Kim was given a very low offer to re-sign when her deal was up and she jumped to WWE. If TNA doesn't start offering these women more money a number of them may jump ship.
Credit to Gerweck.net and I assume Wrestling Observer or PW Insider

TNA is very lucky they are nowhere near the company the WWE is. If they were they would be sued for gender discrimination. With travel expenses it is insane that TNA pays the Knockouts somewhere in the range of $250 a show. Scott Hall was allegedly getting $3,000 an appearance. I like Scott Hall and I hope he gets his shit together some day, but what does it say when basically he was getting paid what ten women in total would have in the same company.

This all goes back to Gail Kim and how TNA shortchanged her. She was by far one of the biggest draws they had and was putting on stellar matches with everyone. But when it came time for her contract to be renewed TNA played hardball and said it couldn’t match what the WWE offered. We know that’s bullshit plain and simple. I have no idea what Gail’s WWE salary is but if I had to guess it’s probably somewhere between $100-200K a year. Maybe more…maybe less but it has to be in that range. Gail was everything they look for in TNA (mainly she was in the WWE).

I’ve explained my theory on TNA’s inferiority complex. That’s why they try to get the WWE’s attention but the WWE ignores them at every turn. Gail Kim would still be the center of the Knockouts if they resigned her but now she’s playing second fiddle to Eve on RAW.

Tara was another high profile former WWE star that TNA signed for the Knockouts division and in my view she was a great wrestler to land as she had some of her best work in years in TNA. Sure they dicked her around with the title and other stupid stuff, but never the less she made it work and did a damn good job. But when it came time for her to resign TNA once again played the money card and said “we love your work but we just can’t afford you right now”.

Once again I say BULL SHIT. If they can afford to bring in big stars like RVD and Jeff Hardy then they can afford at the very least a minimal increase of money to the Knockouts.

Well with Tara gone (though she probably will be back soon since she’s too old for the WWE’s tastes) they had brought back Roxxi who was a proven fan favorite in TNA. People got behind her and she was one of the more popular Knockouts. After breaking her ankle on the decently rated New Years Knockout Eve show she recently came back and was feuding with Madison Rayne over the last couple of weeks. Then at the PPV last week they threw a curveball at her for no apparent reason.

I had heard earlier that there was a ton of backstage heat over a last minute angle change that involved Roxxi, so apparently she showed up and found out she was done with the company. Roxxi was in tears when it was over, but they cut away so fast to show a video for the next match that it didn't really mean anything on the show.
Credit to Dave Meltzer and www.f4wonline.com

How fucked up is that. I mean that is some cold-hearted stuff right there what they did to her. And in typical TNA fashion they have someone forced to retire and they skip to the back for something else.

April Hunter was also on that special and TNA had been trying to sign her to some sort of deal as well. April put out a blog on her decision to turn down TNA’s offer.


I think TNA is missing the boat on women’s wrestling and cruiserweights. This is the niche that founded them…what WWE has consistently left out. This is where they could make themselves stand out. I also think they’re missing the boat on Roxxi. She’s got a unique look and persona - it’s what endears her to fans. She’s not cookie cutter. She’s also one of the best (and safest) females I’ve ever been in a ring with. But most of all, she’s got a stellar work ethic. In a business where so many are content to get by with doing as little as possible, she’ll always give ‘er. I can’t say this about many I’ve crossed paths with in my eleven years in wrestling. I’m coming from a heritage of hard working immigrants, where work ethic means something and entitlement simply doesn’t exist. You earn what you get, and she has.

I am continually disappointed in TNA. They have all the tools, yet can’t figure out how to use them. Dropping the ball is the only thing they excel with.

As a fan, it’s frustrating. As a worker, it’s heartbreaking.

I reckon if Dixie Carter spent half as much time promoting as she does twittering, they might actually have some ratings.
Credit to AprilHunter.com & her newsletter

That last line there is what you call a BURN.

April is smarter then a lot of people will ever give her credit for. She saw the writing on the wall and said the hell with that. But she’s absolutely right in what she says. TNA is missing the boat on women’s wrestling and the X Division. The X Division is the reason why anyone gave this company a chance to begin with.

The X Division is the reason we sat through YEARS of bullshit with Jeff Jarrett where he booked himself over everyone. They are at least trying to build up a credible champion again in Douglas Williams (who’s heel act is great btw), but for the last couple of years the X Division has only been used for cannon fodder to pad the shows.

It’s funny how April called Dixie out on her tweeting since last week Dixie posted a bunch about a big surprise. Naturally people took this to mean that there would be another in a long line of surprises at Slammiversary. It turns out the only surprise of interest was Tommy Dreamer showing up during the Brother Ray/Jesse Neal match. He just appeared in the crowd and then made his way to the back and that distracted Ray long enough for Jesse to win.

I am a huge fan of Tommy Dreamer and I’m glad to see him in TNA. But all they are going to have him do is rehash ECW stuff. Honestly Tommy has a great mind for wrestling and a guy like him should be on the “creative” team. TNA needs a new point of view and Tommy would be a welcome change of pace from what they have now. I’m holding back my full opinions on Tommy since more happens with him and a couple of other former ECW guys on this and next week’s Impact. I’m trying to avoid spoilers for those of you who don’t read them. But lets just say I would take Tommy and this other guy in a position of power booking over the entire TNA creative team any day of the week.

Of course there are plenty of people who are not happy with this. I can see why they are. But you know what I’ll take this over the giant Emo semi-retarded Evad Abyss Sullivan. It could be worse though. Hulk Hogan could be TNA World Champion right now. If he wasn’t so crippled you know it would have happened by now. I’ll have more on Tommy Dreamer and him in TNA as it airs. You know TNA could avoid this problem if they ran live every Thursday night. Don’t have to be spoiled with spoilers and dare I say maybe people would tune in instead of just reading the spoilers and saying meh.

In other news, Scott Hall was let go from TNA so maybe now that they aren’t spending $3 grand on him maybe they can funnel some of that money to the Knockouts. I seriously hope that Scott Hall gets his life together. If he continues to be the legendary drunk that he is it’s only a matter of time before we see a headline like “Scott Hall in need of liver transplant” or “Scott Hall dead from liver failure”. That’s assuming he doesn’t end up like Bon Scott, John Bonham, Keith Moon and so many others who drank themselves to death. It really is sad to see Scott Hall because he should have been a World Champion especially during his run in WCW in the late 90’s. Hell he still has it in him to be a world champion and a top guy in a company. But I suspect this was his last chance in a major company.

On a final note there’s some sort of PPV this weekend from the WWE. They call it Fatal 4 Way where all the big championship matches are Fatal Four Way’s. Yeah that’s really worth the $44.95 right there. Just another PPV in a line of cookie cutter shows that they think branding with special gimmicks is what will draw. It’s here in New York at the Nassau Mausoleum. If the Barclay’s Center is ever built here in Brooklyn people will never have to trek out to Long Island and to that eyesore of an arena. Cena and Swagger will probably retain. Other then that I don’t know what’s on the card and I don’t really care and I’m sure I’m not the only one.

So on that note that is all for this week. As always take care and remember someone has to give you this information and it DAMN well has got to be me.
You can click here to send me any and all feedback at phantomlordnyc@yahoo.com or leave me some feedback on my Facebook page under my given name http://www.facebook.com/josephrd

The Rant Of The Week: What Older Audiences Want

Time is standing still
He gave me back my will
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Going home
I'm going home
My eyes are bleeding
And my heart is weeping
We still hope, we still hope, oh
Take me back
He gave me back my will
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Going home
I'm going home
My eyes are bleeding
And my heart is weeping
We still hope, we still hope, oh

Take me back, take me back
Back to my home, oh, oh...-Stargazer by Rainbow
Rest In Peace Ronnie James Dio

Greetings conversationalists all across the fruited plain, it is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow the one and only Phantom Lord and this is my Rant Of The Week. As always I am coming to you from the urban hellhole that is Brooklyn, New York and I don’t know what it is, but lately anytime it rains here it makes everything feel cold. Maybe it’s a sign of the impending ice age some say will start this decade or that El Nino thing is all screwed up. But either way it would be nice for May to feel like May and not like October. It can feel like October when it’s October.

As you see on the top of the column, one of my musical hero’s Ronnie James Dio has passed away at the age 67. Dio was such an amazing singer and it showed in songs like Stargazer, Light In The Black, Catch The Rainbow and so on and so forth. If you’ve never listened to Rainbow, his work with Black Sabbath/Heaven and Hell, or his solo stuff you really should. Dio was a real singer and a real musician. He didn’t need over modulation and autotune to make a song work. It’s sad that so much garbage passes as popular music today when the real good music is always overlooked. Honestly there are not many bands from today that I will even listen to simply because they do not have the timeless quality that so many bands from yesterday have. All I can hope is Ronnie is a better place now and that great jam session in the sky just got a great singer.

In other news, in case you blinked and missed it the Monday Night Wars are over. It was just about six weeks but TNA seeing the writing on the wall and bleeding buckets of money said the hell with it and moved back to Thursdays. Of course TNA will say they listened to the fans feedback. If TNA were really listening to fans feedback they wouldn’t be up shitcreek right now. Hell they might actually be turning a major profit by now if they listened to us the lowly fans. But TNA is where it is because it is run by some of the most stubborn people on the planet. These same people drove WCW into the ground and here they are doing it once again. It’s quite impressive to do the same thing to two different companies in the same industry ten years apart.

But times are tough and TNA needs to cut a shitload of people right now to save a shitload of money since they spent more then a shitload bringing in people like Hogan, Bischoff, RVD, Hardy, Hall, and Anderson. Apparently Dixie Carter just can’t bring herself to fire the 15-20 people that have been put on the chopping block because of the current economy. You know I’ve always said that despite Dixie being a clueless twit when it comes to running a wrestling company, she at least seems like a genuinely nice person. From everything I’ve ever read or heard about the pro wrestling business, someone who is genuinely nice and caring is somewhat rare. Someone always has a motive for his or her actions but with Dixie she really doesn’t want to hurt anyone.

Only problem is with the way the company is run, there might not be a company to employ all these people.

Just looking at the current TNA roster here’s whom I would cut.

Amazing Red, Dr. Stevie, Kioshi, Rob Terry, Orlando Jordan, & Rhino.

Now I like Red, Stevie, Kioshi, and Rhino but times are tough. Besides all of these guys can make more money and be worth more to other Indies out there then sitting around on TNA waiting to be used as cannon fodder. Well in the case of Kioshi he can just go back to Japan and be a star there.

There are six guys right off the top. Firing people is never good, but sometimes it must be done. Now in the cases of Rob Terry and Orlando Jordan I think they should just rid of them because they have no redeeming value. Terry is a giant roid freak who will never be a top guy because if his matches go more then five minutes (entrance included) you will be exposing him big time.

Orlando Jordan is just a giant pile of suck. I get it, the gimmick is supposed to be controversial but it doesn’t work if the person doing it makes you want to change the channel. Goldust made it work because he had the character and talent to pull it off. The same goes for Adorable Adrian Adonis and the inspiration for all of these characters Adrian Street. Orlando Jordan has none of what those guys had. All he has is the work of someone trying to do something controversial and it falls flat every single time.

In the Observer a couple weeks ago there was a report that some of the friends of Chris Kanyon think he might have been pushed over the edge after seeing Orlando Jordan debut his bi-sexual gimmick. Now while there is no proof of this, it’s not out of the realm of possibilities that Chris was watching Impact and he saw Orlando Jordan doing a gimmick that he knew he could do because he had all ready pitched it so many times. All Orlando Jordan gets is groans from the crowd as we can’t believe they are wasting time with this crap. Kanyon had such an electric personality that I have no doubt that if the WWE or TNA gave him a shot to run with being openly gay on television he would have made it work.

Orlando Jordan is pushing back the hope of any gay or bisexual wrestler being over or taken seriously at least a couple of decades. Of course that is par for the course with all things TNA.

We shall see what happens in TNA probably by next week as they just finished wrapping up a month worth of shows in four days. A lot of good people will probably get cut while a lot of people who should be cut end up staying put.

TNA is coming to here to Brooklyn on July 2nd and I hope to be able to go. I am a bit surprised at the choice of a venue though as TNA has booked MCU Park where the Brooklyn Cyclones play in Coney Island. Now I’m sure it will make for some great videos right next to the Parachute Jump and with the Cyclone Rollercoaster and Dino’s Wonder wheel in the background. But it seems so odd for a house show. It might have been a good choice for a huge PPV, but a house show seems odd especially since there were plenty of venues in Brooklyn that could have housed a TNA event. It’s always been said that TNA House shows are like night and day compared to TNA Television and PPV shows. On the house shows they do that wrestling stuff that people seem to like.

TNA could potentially draw a huge crowd for this show and that would be a good thing for them.

Honestly though TNA needs a major overhaul in marketing because knowing them they are just going to rely on word of mouth on the Internet and that will get them only so far. Earlier I was thinking about the marketing situation and one thing came to my mind and that is TNA needs to find a way to hire Shane McMahon. Now I am not talking about Shane as an on air character or anything. TNA and Spike TV should hire him strictly as an executive because he is one of the main reasons the WWE is the media conglomerate that it is today. Now I know this will probably never happened and if it did happen they would hire Shane to be another on-air boss which would just suck. If TNA wants to really succeed they need someone who can market them and get them noticed because what they are doing right now just isn’t working. And the irony is they have the world’s greatest shiller Don West on the payroll and they don’t even use him on television.

Just one small thing of many that TNA does that makes you scratch your head.

Moving along, the WWE has managed to make NXT somewhat interesting again after a few months of them clearly not giving a shit about it. I think we can all agree the NXT concept was hardly revolutionary. They should have honestly just brought back Tough Enough. At least it could have been their version of The Ultimate Fighter. The show now is just a run of the mill WWE show with no reality aspects even though they claimed it would be reality based. I think it’s fair to say they should have never cancelled ECW. ECW as they had it was a perfectly acceptable wrestling program. I think the biggest problem is that it’s on SyFy. See a show like ECW really should be in syndication like Superstars or Wrestling Challenge used to be in my day. But alas that’s a discussion for another column someday. Right now NXT is somewhat interesting again simply because the WWE finally decided to pull the trigger and let Daniel Bryan be Bryan Danielson.

Danielson going off on the system that the WWE has was a thing of greatness and him bitch slapping Michael Cole was tremendous to watch. In the old days Michael Cole probably would have formed a Paul Jones-esq stable full of guys that he would send to take out Danielson. Hell it’s the same principal that has worked in Memphis for so many decades for Jerry Lawler and company. Truth be told if you take an angle like this and throw it onto RAW then it would make for some really compelling television. Danielson breaking away from the “script” and “shooting” makes for fun television. It’s this kind of stuff that NXT should have been doing from the damn start. This is the kind of reality-based programming we are looking for. TNA tries to do this stuff and they usually fail because it’s not so much them being trying to bring reality in, but them just hoping and praying the WWE takes notice to them.

But the Danielson thing was great as he went off on how it should be guys who can make the WWE the most money and he is the best at what he does and he said he was damn sure better then The Miz. William Regal and CM Punk both agreed with that statement.



If we don’t get a Danielson/Miz match then the whole NXT show will have been for nothing. Granted it has given us the awesomeness that is Wade Barrett and proved to us the theory from Time Cop that the same two people cannot occupy the same space at the same time (John Cena and Darren Young aka Black Cena). But if the whole show was just to get Bryan over with the WWE crowds (and he was) and he never faces The Miz then it was all for NOTHING.

Honestly if this stuff were the kind of sports entertainment the WWE was doing then I’m sure a lot more of us the men in the audience who have to sit through John Cena would have no problem with things being PG. Personally I have no problem with PG. There are just things I would do differently to keep the attention of the only demographic that matters and that’s the male demo of 18-35 year olds. More and more of us are switching to MMA (specifically UFC) and it’s simply because the vast majority of what the WWE does is predictable and boring. Now like I said the stuff with Danielson has been interesting. So has the great feud on Smackdown with CM Punk and Rey Mysterio. Jack Swagger vs. The Big Show is another feud that I hope will continue past the PPV this weekend because it’s been so fun so far.

I can accept that PG is here to say for the foreseeable future. They claim it’s because of sponsors, but in reality it’s just for Linda McMahon’s Senate run (which I will get to later). But just because everything has to be PG it doesn’t mean it has to be boring and predictable. If the WWE took the formula for Smackdown and applied it to RAW things would be pretty good. Granted we would have to still sit through the Cenation but at least we’d get some good television out of it.

Now the only thing I have against TV PG is the lack of blood. Blood has always been an integral part of wrestling. I am not saying every match needs blood for the sake of blood, but a little blood once in a while won’t kill anyone. It’s really stupid to see the WWE stop matches and patch guys up if they have a split lip or a paper cut over the eye. Sadly though this is the direction the WWE wants to go. I could understand the reasoning for no blood if it were for health concerns. But since I am guessing HIV and stuff like Staph are not a huge problem for the WWE it really wouldn’t hurt if once in a while especially in cage matches if there was some blood.

There probably won’t be any intentional blood for a long time to come (or at least till all the Cena marks hit puberty and McMahon changes the product to cater to all those horny teens). There was an interesting interview with the Chief Operating Officer of the WWE Donna Goldsmith. TNA must have been giddy since the WWE mentioned them (even though the WWE completely buried them).

These are interview highlights from the JP Morgan Global Technology, Media and Telecom Conference.

WWE might not publicly acknowledge the existence of TNA Wrestling on official WWE programming, but WWE is aware of TNA's programming on Spike TV.

WWE COO Donna Goldsmith criticized TNA's programming during a media & technology conference yesterday, saying TNA is "blood, guts, and gore" compared to their toned-down, PG product.

"If you look at another program called TNA, which is a wrestling program on Spike, that is blood and guts and gore. We are not going there, nor I would say have we ever been to that degree that they are," Goldsmith said at the J.P. Morgan Global Media, Technology, and Media Conference in Boston. "We decided no blood and if someone gets hit by accident, we will stop the match if we have to and take care of them. Those decisions (to market WWE TV as PG) were made consciously."

Goldsmith said WWE made the change to PG to help them draw revenue across the board by being able to establish more partnerships that would make money for the company.

"The networks are telling us we're PG and we're talking to our potential partners and they are saying, 'Prove to us you are PG and we will sign off on them.' Goldsmith said prior to officially going PG, they would show potential sponsors their reach on TV, their website, and live events, but sponsors would pass due to the content, saying 'The content leaves us a little bit uncomfortable.'

"We spoke to the writers, we spoke to Vince (McMahon), we spoke to public relations and asked if we can still keep the programming cool and edgy while taking it down a notch," Goldmsith said. "Our writers, yeah, they were challenged a little bit, but they said, 'We can do it. We can make this program just as good as it's been.' They started to take the program in a little bit of a different direction."

Goldsmith said they've had potential partners come back and want to work with WWE, including 7-Eleven with another summer promotion and Burger King with a "global Kid's Meal program" for the first-time ever.

I wouldn’t call TNA’s product Blood, Guts, and Gore. They haven’t quite lowered themselves to the level of say Big Japan where every other match involved light tubes and barbwire…though I wouldn’t be surprised if that did happen some day. Going PG is making them more money, but you know what else would make the WWE money? Not having a boring and predictable show.

The thing the WWE needs to realize though as much as they call themselves sports entertainment, as long as there is that second W in the name they will always be a lowly wrestling company to the vast majority of people. Oh sure you can try and have “mainstream appeal” but it’s always been a pipe dream to think that the mainstream will ever accept anything McMahon does as anything but lowly wrestling. Don’t get me wrong; I am a capitalist through and through so I am all about making money. If the WWE is able to make a profit in this God forsaken economy then more power to them. The fact remains things are boring and predictable and they will be for a long time to come for one simple reason and that’s because Vince thinks he has no competition.

Vince and the WWE hierarchy have delude themselves into thinking MMA is not competition. I’m not even going to mention TNA as competition because they aren’t. The UFC whether Vince will admit it or not is the WWE’s competition and they have continually dominated and destroyed the WWE buyrate wise month after month in PPV’s which is the only real number that counts.

UFC can get away with charging $44.95 a PPV because they build the hell out of their fights. Jim Cornette said it best a while back in an interview he did when he said UFC books their shows like wrestling used to in the 70’s and early 80’s. Even the shows that many consider to be throwaway’s end up having fights that make it worth the price of ordering. Sure some PPV’s have stinkers, but name any PPV that doesn’t have at least one stinker on it.

But for those of you who think the WWE has sucked ever since TV 14 went away, there’s more bad news for you potentially on the horizon.


Now if you think that’s bad…

WWE COO Donna Goldsmith said yesterday at the JP Morgan Global Technology, Media and Telecom Conference that WWE is talking with Nickelodeon about bringing an animated TV series to the network.

Goldsmith also said she recently talked with Vince McMahon about how WWE has walked away from their older audience in recent years and talked about new ideas to get that audience back.

Goldsmith said McMahon suggested a nostalgia or Legends program.

Yep it’s coming full circle folks. It’s 1985 all over again and Hulk Hogan’s Rock N’ Wrestling is going to make a comeback. Now I’m sure if something as horrible as a modern WWE Cartoon ever happened it would be a great marketing tool for the WWE. But I’m just horrified at the thought of how the animation is going to look. I am very old school when it comes to cartoons. When it comes to perfectly drawn cartoons they don’t get any better then Looney Toons or Hanna–Barbera cartoons. Hell the last great animated cartoon at least for my generation (in my mind) had to between Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, The X-Men or Batman: The Animated Series.

I’m not a fan of the kind of animation Nickelodeon has on their network now. If it’s not computer then it’s really horrible exaggerated drawing. I can’t imagine the WWE would go out of their way to get really good animation if a cartoon series ever did happen. Iron Man: Armored Adventures is pretty good on Nicktoons (where I would imagine a WWE inspired show would land) so if they got that animation house to do it then visually speaking it wouldn’t be bad. Story wise I can just imagine how horrible it would be. John Cena overcoming even more odds. Just put him in a blue suit and red cape and make the transformation complete.

Stuff like this is great to get the younger audience. But the older audiences are the ones who have to sit through everything so the younger audience can watch and as I mentioned before, the older audience…mainly the male demo are leaving the WWE and wrestling in general for MMA.
I have a funny feeling USA along with the WWE have spent money on focus groups to see what we men want. They probably took one look at those results as most companies do and decided the audience doesn’t know what they want so they’ll watch what we give them and like it. It’s that attitude that is the main reason RAW is so hit or miss to the fans. Sure some stuff is great, but the rest of it falls flat. And make no mistake, when the WWE talks about losing fans they are talking about RAW. RAW is the flagship of the company and it dictates how the ship sails so to speak. It’s funny to think that all McMahon can think of to get old fans back is more nostalgia.

From a nostalgia standpoint it was special to see Bret Hart win the United States championship in Toronto. I have no idea where they are going with this because Bret cannot do much except the Sharpshooter. But you know what? When Bret locked it on and he held up that belt for a small moment it felt like the way things used to be. Back during a time when things were all right. But like I said, where they are going with this I don’t know.

This has been the main problem with the WWE for years. Story and angle wise for the most part things just make no sense.

Oh the one thing we do not need is more Legends. I like seeing them once in a while to show they still got it, but we don’t need more legends. If you want to do more Legends stuff then produce more Legends Roundtables on WWE Classics. That’s a show that should be updated monthly. TNA books itself around WWE legends and well look where it’s gotten them.

Looking at the page count I realize I have written a small book here so if you are anything like me, your attention span must be wearing thin by now so I’m gonna wrap things up with some bits and pieces of news.

The rumor going around about RAW's new General Manager on Monday is that it will be former ECW personality and WWE developmental star Abraham Washington, of The Abraham Washington Show fame.
Credit to www.f4wonline.com

I might just delete RAW off the DVR if this happens. The Abraham Washington Show was some of the most uncomfortable television to ever sit through. Mostly because of the horrible writing and that was ECW. The horrible writing factor would go up ten fold on RAW. There’s a better rumor of Michael Cole becoming the new RAW GM to go with his new heel persona that he does brilliantly on NXT. See now that I would want to see. Abraham Washington doing his Obama gimmick with no Tony Atlas? I think I’ll pass.

WWE fired Carlito yesterday for an alleged Wellness Program violation and subsequent refusal to enter rehab. The report on WWE.com noted that his termination followed a first violation of the program. However, WWE sources indicate that Carlito did not fail a drug test but instead was fired after he arrived at Monday’s RAW in Toronto and management felt that he was unfit to perform. According to Dave Meltzer, everything went down on Monday and drug test results wouldn't have been available at the time Carlito's release was announced.
Credit to www.f4wonline.com

I was surprised this happened the other day because it finally looked like they were going to use Carlito for something. I’ve always been under the impression that Carlito despite his perceived attitude problems was always held down while he was on RAW. He could have been a much bigger star then he was. He was always fairly over with the crowds but the WWE like they do to a lot of people handcuffed him and he could never establish himself with anything other then the apple. Well I’m sure it’s no big loss for Carlito. He’s wanted to get out of the WWE for a couple of years now. I’m sure TNA will give him a deal when they can and he’ll probably be an X Division champion in six months time. Worse comes to worse he goes back to Puerto Rico and is the biggest star in his old man’s company WWC. All he needs is someone to be an Abdullah The Butcher for him and he’ll have steady work for the next 40 or 50 years.

Randy Savage's marriage to longtime girlfriend Lynn Payne has an interesting back story. Savage and Payne actually met for the first time in 1974 at Lido Beach in Sarasota, FL. At the time, Savage was playing minor league baseball for the Tampa Tarpons and Payne was attending school at the Ringling School of Art and Design. They dated for two years before parting ways. After a near three-decade separation, the couple reunited in 2001.

"Thirty-six years ago, Lynn and I met on
Lido Beach," said Poffo. "I feel so fortunate that I had a second chance to marry my first love, here where it all began."

Credit: Wrestling Globe Newsletter

Credit to TimBoylesPhotography.com

Congratulations to The Macho Man Randy Savage on his marriage. Savage has done what a lot of guys his age have not been able to and that’s stay clear of wrestling after retirement. Granted he would probably make a great commentator for some company, but I am glad that he has found true love again. The whole Randy/Elizabeth saga had as sad of an ending as it gets so to see he found his first love and they finally got together after all of these years it does give you hope especially to all the hopeless romantics out there.

So to The Macho Man and Lynn…Salute.

On that happy note I am done for this week. There’s some sort of PPV this weekend from the WWE. If Batista wins the WWE title I will be very very very VERY surprised. But until next time take care and remember someone has to give you this information and it DAMN well has got to be me.

You can click here to send me any and all feedback at phantomlordnyc@yahoo.com or leave me some feedback on my Facebook page under my given name http://www.facebook.com/josephrd

The Rant Of The Week: Meltdown's & Knockouts

Greetings conversationalists all across the fruited plain, it is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow the one and only Phantom Lord and this is the ever important Rant Of The Week. As always I am coming to you from the urban hellhole that is Brooklyn, New York and you know there must be some fun topics of interest if I am writing a column in consecutive weeks. It’s been a long while since the Rant Of The Week was well The Rant Of The Week. I used to bang these out once a week and that was post WCW being closed. I might have missed out on the glory years of the IWC, but thanks to TNA and the WWE going PG there seems to be a never-ending source of material, which is a good thing for lowly columnists like myself.

Oddly enough it was a beautiful cloudy Sunday here in New York so I was in a rather good mood and it might actually reflect that here in this column. Of course don’t think just because I’m somewhat happy I won’t be the same objective realist that I always am. If something deserves my praise it will get it. On the flip side if something deserves my wrath then it will get it.

Now with the Jim Cornette meltdown alert status at Defcon 2, I will get to everything involving him, Uncle Eric, and TNA in due time. But first I wanted to try something new and take a stab at MMA. MMA is where a lot of people say all the real fans of Pro Wrestling are going because quite frankly they have something TNA and the WWE usually don’t and that’s good action and compelling storylines. On Saturday Night was the Strikeforce CBS Saturday Night Fight’s event and for the most part I thought it was pretty good. I was watching that and the never-ending 20-inning game between the Mets and St. Louis Cardinals and for a time, The Strikeforce event had more hits and offense. If you want to look at it from a wrestling standpoint, Strikeforce is TNA to the UFC’s WWE. UFC is the 800-pound gorilla and Strikeforce is the little company with a massive inferiority complex trying to compete against them on a huge scale.

MMA is at a point where it’s trying to take over the mantle of what Boxing one was. Unfortunately for MMA, there are still plenty of detractors who say it’s human cockfighting and it should be banned. Many of these people are getting ammunition after the events to close the Strikeforce event when ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE after Jason “Mayhem” Miller came into the cage and asked Jake Shields when is he getting his rematch. A shove is thrown and the next thing you know the Diaz Brothers are going to town on Mayhem and it’s a good old fashion Boxing riot inside the cage. From a Pro Wrestling standpoint I thought it was great. Every sport needs a compelling story to draw people in and Mayhem Miller is such a prick, he’s the kind of guy you would pay to see get his ass kicked. Of course all the MMA people don’t see it as such. They see it as a black on the sport and with the low ratings the show had it could possibly be a deathblow for national television and Strikeforce.

Personally I don’t think that will be the case. If ratings were low it’s simply because CBS has shown time and a time again they don’t know how to promote anything. Of course Strikeforce is equally to blame because they have no one in that company who seems to know what they are doing when it comes to promotion or building a brand. If Shane McMahon does ever get into MMA, He should work with Strikeforce ASAP. If anyone could benefit from brand development, it sure as hell is Strikeforce.

All is not lost with Strikeforce though. They still have Fedor and as long as they build the company around him as the best fighter of any sport in the world all should be fine. I just hope after the brawl this weekend, Mayhem is on the fast track for a title shot against Shields because I would love to see Jake beat the shit out of him.

Moving back to that Pro Wrestling stuff, the big story of last week was Jim Cornette coming close to having another full scale meltdown as TNA sent him a legal letter over an e-mail he sent to Terry Taylor where he said if he could do it and get away with it, he would kill Vince Russo.



The Jim Cornette DEFCON Alert Status is a good barometer of Jim’s state of mind. While his moods vary between each alert level, it is clear that Jim is moving closer and closer to a full-blown RED ALERT.

In Cornette’s history, much like the real DEFCON system we’ve never hit the red alert. We’ve come really close several times though. The most famous of which is when Cornette slapped Johnny Geo Basco backstage numerous times after Geo Basco laughed during what was supposed to be a serious scary angle. Basco is now known as Santino Marella and Cornette was trying (in vein) to build The Boogeyman into a feared act and things had been brewing before that and Santino laughing thus destroying his hard work caused Jim to pretty much go off the deep end. But as bad as that was, it wasn’t a full-blown meltdown.

Right now there is a back and forth war of words between Cornette and Eric Bischoff and along with this legal letter TNA sent him accusing him of terrorist threats against Vince Russo and his family, much like the Katla volcano in Iceland we might be on the verge of THE BIG ONE. The conditions are right as pressure has been building. Cornette sees TNA as a company with all the tools for success but instead of success the same people that screwed him and many other people are driving it into the ground. It happened in WCW and now it’s happening again in TNA. The worst thing for someone like Cornette is to keep screaming that something is wrong and instead of being listened to he is getting mocked and could in theory be facing legal troubles if TNA really wanted to screw with him.

The sad thing about all of this is Ring Of Honor is caught in the middle of it. Cornette is working for ROH so the question is with someone openly saying they want to see someone die, how can they in good conscience keep that person as part of the company. Granted Cornette is working for free with ROH, but after the whole RF scandal a few years ago the last thing ROH needs is someone else bringing bad publicity to their company. The funny thing is if there were ever a time to do a TNA vs. ROH feud it would be now. Bischoff and Cornette just screaming at each other would probably be the best main event Impact could have. I would laugh if somehow deep down this is all a double super secret work to benefit both companies. I’ve always said these companies should be working with each other…not against each other.

ROH had some good success with the ROH/CZW feud a couple of years ago. ROH invading TNA to take on TNA and all that is wrong with it would make for fun television. Of course it would never happen, but one can always fantasy book.

TNA had a decent PPV last night with Lockdown. Sure there was plenty of the usual TNA insanity, but there was also a decent amount of good action. But one thing that drove me mad was The Beautiful People vs. Tara/Angelina Love Title for Titles match. I have never liked this stipulation where it’s a tag match of some sort and depending on who pins whom you either win a singles title or a tag title. Now I didn’t see the match, but just reading the results I couldn’t do anything but shake my head.

Angelina Love won the Knockouts title via lockbox two weeks ago. Now I love Angelina; but she is bland as hell as a face so I really wish Tara were still champion (people are hating on her too much btw). Last week they had a train wreck of a match where Velvet cashed in her anyone anytime any match contract in what supposed to be a Leather and Lace deal but when it came time she said she changed her mind. Meanwhile she stacked the deck against Angelina and she could have choose a match where she could have easily won the Knockouts title in a great heel move but instead she said “I’m gonna wait a week to beat you in the cage to show everyone how good of a wrestler I am”.

I along with a good portion of the Internet was scratching our collective heads at that one, but this is TNA so it’s par for the course. Long story short after all of that Angelina ends up losing the Knockouts title to Madison Rayne and The Beautiful People have all the Knockouts Gold.

Now I like The Beautiful People, I really do. They are great at what they do and they are easily one of the best heel factions in all of wrestling. Angelina Love should not be a bland face. She should be the super bitch back as the leader of The Beautiful People. Melina has the same problem in the WWE. She is horrible as a face. But as a super bitch she is incredible. I dread the day that Maryse is turned face because that will ruin her. But I just can’t see the reasoning in Madison Rayne winning the Knockouts title in a throw away match when they were building another Angelina/Tara feud. Don’t get me wrong, Madison is great and she is the glue that holds TBP together, but it just makes no sense. It’s amazing how far the Knockouts have come from the days of Gail Kim as the Torchbearer.

By how far, I’m not saying that in a good way. They have fallen from being one of the highlights of the show to comedy segments. Gail Kim who was by far one of TNA’s biggest draws, when her contract came all she wanted was a deal that was good financially and Dixie said, “well we’re sorry, but we don’t have the kind of money the WWE has”. Gail ended up taking the WWE deal and while it’s good money wise for her, wrestling wise she’s second or third fiddle and not the centerpiece she was in TNA. Awesome Kong who was by far another one of TNA’s best draws wanted a good deal as well but TNA shafted her on money. By some reports she was only making $400 a show.

Christie Hemme (who I like) was signed to a $175k a year contract just because she was a former WWE star and Playboy cover girl. Tara (another one I like) apparently has a big money deal as well, but her contract is coming up soon according to some reports and they don’t know if she will re-sign. I wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t simply because of the way she’s been booked. I mean she lost the Knockouts title via key turn all because of a stupid spider.

It’s mind numbing to think TNA had some of the best Women’s wrestlers in North America and let them walk. Cheerleader Melissa aka Alyssa Flash comes to mind right off the bat. If there was ever a woman you could build a women’s division around it is her. They have Ayako Hamada on the roster now and they do NOTHING with her. Hamada is one of the best female wrestlers on the entire planet and she just fills the background for the most part in meaningless tag matches. They had her teamed with Awesome Kong as the Knockouts tag champions, but when the whole Bubba/Kong deal happened and Kong that left her up shit creek so to speak. I would love to see Hamada get a run as Knockouts champion, but I doubt that would ever happen.

ODB is another favorite of many others and mine and she is by far one of the most popular wrestlers in all of TNA. So it boggles the mind that TNA does nothing with her either. All they use her for is really lame comedy or filler for tag matches. I always thought it was a huge mistake she didn’t win the Knockouts title in late 2008. When she finally did win the title it was part of a stupid comedy angle with Cody Deener. Now I’m all for Men vs. Women matches when they are done right. Andy Kaufman proved you could get nuclear heat and make tons of money with them. But when they are nothing but lame comedy to fill TV time it defeats the purpose of them and ODB and Cody Deener sure as hell deserved better then that.

Sarita and Taylor Wylde are a pretty dynamic tag team and perfect baby faces that any division men or women’s would need. YET WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY???

You see the point I am getting at here folks. Even in it’s current state the TNA Knockouts division is better then the WWE Women’s/Divas and yet TNA does nothing with them or ignores their importance all together. I honestly don’t understand why TNA doesn’t have a second show for the Knockouts. I mean its Spike TV so I think they can fit an hour on late Saturday nights for a Knockouts show. They can cram all the comedy they want into that plus they can put all the women they have on the roster to use. For an added bonus show video of them doing photo shoots in skimpy outfits…it’s a win/win for everyone involved. It’s not like it has to be SHIMMER where everything is super competitive. Just don’t relegate the Knockouts who have proven to be ratings draws to small segments that most people will fast forward through on the DVR.

Moving along I was shocked that TNA had a really good episode of Impact this week. The post Lockdown show was really good which is amazing since TNA usually screws up shows after their big PPV’s. They had two huge matches on the show with RVD facing Jeff Hardy for a shot at the TNA World Title with the winner getting the title shot later in the night. RVD won and he took on AJ Styles and RVD is now the new TNA World Heavyweight Champion. I thought both matches were great, but I had one small tiny problem with it.

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PEOPLE GIVE AWAY THESE MATCHES WITH NO BUILD WHAT SO EVER???

Okay I get it; PPV is a lost cause so there’s no point of building up PPV matches because aside from the big events no one gives a shit about them. But how in the world do you give these matches away with no build up what so ever? At the very least you could have slowly built up the RVD/Hardy feud for a month before you pulled the trigger on a match with them. Then Styles could have ducked RVD for weeks before he was finally forced into the match. I’m sure RVD will do great as champion so long as there isn’t the usual screwy TNA booking, but it just boggles the mind how they blew their wad on this one. I compare it to that because I couldn’t help but thinking of that scene in American Pie where Jim is with Nadia and he blows his load before he can do anything. Yes I know it’s crude, but Raven described building an angle like building up to an orgasm. You can either do it the right way and have it be mind blowing, or do it quick and cheap and be left unfulfilled.

I think that sums up a lot about TNA. A lot of unfulfillment on there part, for us the long-suffering wrestling fan.

On the plus side it appears Samoa Joe is back after some how escaping the Juggalo ninja’s that kidnapped him over a month ago. You know any other company probably would have turned that into an angle of some sort. Hell we could have probably got some fun Cactus Jack Lost In Cleveland type videos as people search for Samoa Joe. Ah well at least Joe is back and he’s reverted back to his 2005 self. So long to the Nation Of Violence and having a penis painted on your face.

Another bright side in TNA is crazy Ric Flair. Ric Flair is becoming Randy The Ram more and more with each passing week. I don’t know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Yes people are complaining about Flair ruining his retirement, but as long as a wrestler is breathing no retirement is ever final. Flair has three alimonies to pay so sadly he might be doing insane shit for the next decade no matter what company he is in. The only thing a lot of us on the Internet have an issue with is the fact that Ric Flair bleeds for no apparent reason anymore.

I am all for blood in wrestling, but Flair is tapping gushers for no reason. Did his skin become so thin that the lightest touch causes it to rip open? Did Flair some how become a hemophiliac where a paper cut causes a gusher? Ric Flair can put over people better then anyone else. But he shouldn’t have to tap a gusher every time someone nails him with a punch. Flair can be the new JJ Dillon and he has the new Horsemen in the form of AJ Styles, Desmond Wolfe, and Beer Money. They just need to pull the trigger and make it official. This group right here can be the greatest heel stable group in all of wrestling. The hell with rehashing the n.w.o. or stuff with Austin/McMahon. That’s how they should of kept the belt on Styles. Have the new Horsemen protect him at all costs.

TNA I just gave you guys a major money idea…yet again. Maybe you guys should hire me or something. You do have my contact information floating around somewhere (insert smiley face).

Well on that shameless note I think I am done for this week. Before I go I just want say that The Truth did the best thing he has done in his entire career and that was getting blown up by MacGruber. I haven’t laughed that hard at anything the WWE has done in years. Phantom Classic (my father) said and I do quote “Thank God they finally got rid of him”.

Sadly our joy was short lived as The Truth was on that NXT thing (or so I read from the results). Wow NXT is probably a whole other column and how the WWE fucked that one up. Wade Barrett is awesome though, so the show at least has one good thing from it.

So until next time take care and remember someone has to give you this information and it DAMN well has got to be me.

You can click here to send me any and all feedback at phantomlordnyc@yahoo.com or leave me some feedback on my Facebook page under my given name http://www.facebook.com/josephrd